Sunday, October 23, 2011

Page filler.

You know when they write the newspaper, and there is that empty space at the bottom of the page? Well, they have to somehow fill that space... and it's called a page filler- it has no relevant meaning to the material otherwise stated and people just read them because they have nothing else to do. I feel like that word describes me so well- it's almost eerie to think about... I know this sounds very "emo" of me, but I've been thinking a lot lately. I've been thinking that I'm not good at anything. I feel that I show nothing special considering I've been alive for 20 thriving years. Maybe that's why I always have that constant feeling that I'm missing something, because I'm not doing anything special. I don't want to be categorized in the category as a middle child. You know, middle child as in, you basically just fill up space and do absolutely nothing. (I have nothing against middle children, it's just a figure of speech). This quote sums things up.
"We’re the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War’s a spiritual war… our Great Depression is our lives. We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won’t. And we’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very pissed off."

Well, here are some pictures

 My favorite part of Ogden. So peaceful.


 I'm seriously in love with Fall! I love the atmosphere of it. So relaxing and such a great feeling of going outside and having the fresh air surround you.

 Went to a haunted house! 

 Pretty much sums up my life. Booooo ):

I'm going to make a bracelet like the one on the bottom of this stack.

Put together this outfit, and I really want it!!!

Monday, October 10, 2011

Call the doctor.

No, really call the doctor. I'm starting to get my first cold of the season. So soon? ): Why me? Meh, I guess I'll just get it over with. Tomorrow I'm taking a trip to the store to load up on vitamin C and zinc.
Well, this last week I really put off doing homework, laundry, cleaning my car, and um... pretty much everything.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Well, it happened...

Regardless of my constant dread and begging, I turned the BIG 20. Surprisingly, I feel different. Maybe it's just me over thinking the whole thing, but I really do feel different. Older? Wiser? Closer to death? Maybe all the above? Who knows?...  I detest my birthdays- if you haven't noticed. I just hate the thought of "growing up". Growing up entails: A job you hate, predictable days, no time for friends, buying groceries, and all that other nonsense. I don't know, maybe I'm looking at this whole thing from the wrong perceptive.
Well, I hate my new job. I hate my boss. So I'm painstakingly throwing in the towel and going to put in my two week notice. Yes, I've only worked there a month, but I want to just take a trip, meet people, read a book all day, start getting into learning again, and spend the night at my sister's house. So to reiterate, yes I am quitting all my jobs. Well... I will still periodically work in Brigham, just because car payments don't pay themselves- sadly. My whole life I've been working since I was the appropriate age, I just want to not have to worry about going to work everyday. I guess this makes me sound really lazy, maybe I am. I don't really know what I am or what I'm not at this point in life. I don't think this is normal... not just anybody would quit their job that pays them almost 12 dollars an hour. I may or may not regret this, but I guess we'll find out. The feeling of something missing is persistently growing into a big knot in my stomach, and it gets so bad that I feel the unnecessary urge to emesis. To much information? :/ hah.